The Taste of Ashes
Aug. 28th, 2006 05:31 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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firefly_fanficTitle: The Taste of Ashes
Disclaimer: Belongs to somebody not me. Blah blah blah, yackety schmackety
Rating: PG-13
A fault line, right down the middle of his heart. Mal was a broken man, of that he was well aware. Broken of faith, broken of innocence, broken of belief.
He knew precisely where his fault lines were - the map that showed the cracks in his soul.
Best as he could tell, Inara was unbroken. Whole and complete. Even after Miranda, she had no cracks, no breaks.
If he went to her, asked for the very thing he needed to heal himself, it would break her as well. And too many people had been broken on his watch for him to wish that on her.
Especially her.
She was the one whole and good thing that had ever wandered through his life. The thought of seeing his own hollowness reflected in her eyes was more than he could bear.
She'd gotten a taste of it at Miranda, when she finally just let him hold her. And he'd let himself believe that was enough.
Mal knew what that dish tasted like - all bitter ashes and dried husks. He'd choked it down at Serenity Valley and could still taste it on the back of his tongue. Some days, he thought it would be with him until the day he died.
Not a taste she should come to know.
Disclaimer: Belongs to somebody not me. Blah blah blah, yackety schmackety
Rating: PG-13
A fault line, right down the middle of his heart. Mal was a broken man, of that he was well aware. Broken of faith, broken of innocence, broken of belief.
He knew precisely where his fault lines were - the map that showed the cracks in his soul.
Best as he could tell, Inara was unbroken. Whole and complete. Even after Miranda, she had no cracks, no breaks.
If he went to her, asked for the very thing he needed to heal himself, it would break her as well. And too many people had been broken on his watch for him to wish that on her.
Especially her.
She was the one whole and good thing that had ever wandered through his life. The thought of seeing his own hollowness reflected in her eyes was more than he could bear.
She'd gotten a taste of it at Miranda, when she finally just let him hold her. And he'd let himself believe that was enough.
Mal knew what that dish tasted like - all bitter ashes and dried husks. He'd choked it down at Serenity Valley and could still taste it on the back of his tongue. Some days, he thought it would be with him until the day he died.
Not a taste she should come to know.