Legacy-Betrayal Ch.7 - Mal/Inara

[druinsanity.livejournal.com]

Title: Legacy - Betrayal
Authors: druinsanity and bashipforever
Summary: AU Takes place two and a half years after the end of the series. The movie never happened, but if you’ve read the comic book Those Left Behind, it did. Everything Inara has worked for in her life is finally happening but an old friend shows up, making her doubt everything she’s wanted.
Pairing: Mal/Inara
Rating: PG-13 - R
A/N: The title comes from an Emily Dickenson poem. This is a WIP but it is being updated daily so you shouldn’t have to wait for too long for updates.
A/N2: This is the sequel to a trilogy in this series. Please read Legacy before this to fill in any blanks. This second part is a month after the ending to the first.

You left me, sweet, two legacies,-
A legacy of love
A Heavenly Father would content,
Had He the offer of;

You left me boundaries of pain
Capacious as the sea,
Between eternity and time,
Your consciousness and me.

Ch.1 Ch.2 Ch.3 Ch.4 Ch.5 Ch.6


CHAPTER SEVEN

Mal sat in the shuttle, letting it surround him like a warm blanket. He'd needed to be in here not with his things but with Inara's things. It was easier to believe things were as they should be when he was here. Everything was laced with her scent and had her name written all over it.

He'd bathed and had sat down to put his boots back on. That had been an hour ago. Now, he sat on the couch lost in thoughts, scrambled and fragmented. All of them melding into each other as if they belonged together.

He went over the entire scene on Haven over and over, trying to think of what he could have and should have done differently. Never let your guard down... never again. The things the Alliance officers had said to him and the names they'd hurled at him... both the first time and before. My day's gonna come. Never let my guard down.

"Captain... you may want to come look at this." Wash's voice sounded over the comm.

Mal finished putting his boots on and pulled on a blue shirt. After tucking it in and putting on suspenders, he grabbed his holster and headed out of the shuttle towards the bridge. He found Wash and Kaylee there, looking almost sick. "What is it?"

"Well, we did what we normally do an' hacked into the Alliance programs to get the latest want ads and the like... found somethin' we shouldn't have." Kaylee said, wringing her hands together nervously.

Wash watched Mal, wide-eyed. "The motherload of things we shouldn't have downloaded."

Mal leaned in to look at the screen and began reading. "Zhe shi shenme lan dongxi? I don't understand... kidnapping?"

"Well, it's hard to understand, we only got some of it and there are parts that are encrypted... We'll have to study it more, but it looks like one of the programs run by the Alliance. Kidnapping, programming, and using... heavy on the using." Wash tried to explain. "It's all muckity muck right now."

"Un-muck it." Mal shook his head, disbelievingly. "Programming... something like what they did to River?"

Kaylee nodded. "Seems that way. Only got a few of the cases but the data's all mussed up. There're pictures though."

Mal scrolled down and opened one of the files. A small child seeming to be no more than seven or eight stared back at him. He opened another one to find a picture of a grown woman. "Gotta be more than this. Work on unscramblin' these files. Wanna know what's goin' on here."

"How's 'Nara?" Kaylee asked.

Mal paused and shrugged lightly. "She'll be fine."

Kaylee took a step towards the captain. She could tell he was completely closed off and it worried her. "Weren't your fault you know..."

Mal stepped back and then started out of the bridge. "Get to work on them files." As he left Kaylee and Wash behind he cursed silently under his breath. Wangbadan Alliance... Always thinkin' they can change human bein's to fit their needs. Can't ever break. Never let my guard down.

* Two Days Later*

"You can't keep him, you know...I've known a lot of men, Inara and men like him don't stick around. He'll get restless, need more, want more than you've got to give. Particularly now that you've got so little to offer. You're scarred and jobless. The guild wouldn't even take you back at this point. It's a shame. You had such a bright future at one point and you've thrown it all away for a man who will leave you,” Dria knitted as she spoke. It was a long scarf that piled around her feet, getting longer and longer with every second.

"You're wrong. He loves me. He wants to marry me," Inara protested but it sounded slightly weak even to her.

"Does he? He might have before you caused him so much trouble. Men don't like women who cause them trouble. They like things simple, uncomplicated. That's why companions are such a lucrative profession. Only you're not a companion anymore. You've got all the disadvantages and pitfalls of a regular woman," Dria continued.

"You're wrong," Inara told her but the words were said to convince her rather than Dria.

"You're wrong," Inara murmured in her sleep. She woke up with a jolt, casting her eyes around the room. She found Mal sitting across the room on the couch watching her sleep. She smiled, calming a little at the sight of him there. She sat up slowly and moved over to the couch with Mal.

Mal heard Inara say something in her sleep induced state but didn't make out the words. He got to his feet and met her halfway, helping her the rest of the way to the couch. It had been two days since they'd gotten back to Haven, but Simon still hadn't been completely sure that it was okay to travel with Inara in her condition.

He was getting restless and fidgety being on land for so long. Maybe today they could get in the air and find some work. He'd spent most of his time checking on Inara and looking over Kaylee's and Wash's shoulder to keep track of their decoding of the Alliance files. So far, there hadn't been much luck on that front. When he could, he escaped to walk about Haven away from anyone and anything that would get in the way of his needed time alone.

He got Inara to the couch and sat back down next to her, his arms wrapping around her to hold her to him. "Brought you some food." He told her quietly. He reached out and lifted a cloth off of a plate he'd piled with roasted ham, fruits, and vegetables then set the plate in his lap where Inara could easily reach it. "Always got good food here. Can see why the preacher's likin' it."

"Thank you," Inara smiled, picked up the fork sitting across the plate and speared a long slice of zucchini. She delicately took a bite off the end and sighed contentedly. "They do have good food here. It's the one thing I miss being out in the black...all the food."

"Don't really miss anything out in the black." Mal said, watching as Inara ate. "What was that dream about? Talkin' in your sleep and such."

Inara fixed her gaze on the floor, eyes narrowed as she focused on the pattern on the rug below her feet. She dipped her head and shrugged. "It was...nothing. It just...it was ridiculous." She took a deep breath then winced at the pain it caused. "Dria was just...telling me that you'd-you aren't thinking about leaving me...are you?" she asked, casting a quick glance at Mal before dropping it again.

Mal paused for a moment, not sure what to tell her or how to answer that question. "Ain't gonna lie. Thought has crossed my mind of how much better off you'd be without my influence about you." His own gaze lowered to the floor of the shuttle. "Hard to think about not havin' you though..." He trailed off and was quiet for a bit before looking back up to her and lifting a corner of his lips in a small half smile. "No need to be worryin' your pretty head 'bout that right now, darlin'. We're right fine. Now eat up. Your body's got some healin' to do."

Her stomach roiled at Mal's words and she put down the zucchini she'd been eating. Inara pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and nodded slightly. "Is it-is it because of the scars on my back? Or because...because of what I did to you before on Sihnon? Have you just changed your mind?" Her voice was quiet, tattered around the edges.

"No, 'Nara... Nothin' like that. You're beautiful and I'd want you even if there were scars on your face or anywhere. Be kinda hypocritical of me to be leavin' cause of scars and the like." Mal reached up to brush Inara's hair back and put a hand under her chin to lift her gaze to his. "Ain't said I was leavin'... and I ain't really wantin' to talk about it. You got me where it counts... no matter what, dong ma?"

"Dong Ma," she half whispered and picked up the plate on Mal's lap. She set it aside on the low table in front of the couch and pulled her legs up, laying them across Mal's so that she could curl up into him. She took a deep breath of him and closed her eyes, laying her head against his chest so she could hear his heart beat. "I should have said yes that night and insisted Shepard marry us that night." Her voice was a low whisper aching with fear.

She could see the value of the cage marriage provided now. If they’d been married he’d be beholden to stay with her. Yes marriages could be dissolved but it took time, effort and paperwork. It made it much harder for him to leave her logistically.

Mal wrapped one arm tight around Inara and draped the other one across her legs. He smirked lightly and shook his head. "Couldn't be doin' that... woulda offset your stubborn nature. M'likin' you the way you are. Ain't lookin' to change anything."

The corner of Inara's lips lifted in a slight smile. "Oh so you like it when I tell you no a few dozen times before I say yes?" she asked in a lightly teasing tone.

"Annoyin' as all hell... but also you. Wouldn't change a thing about you." Mal said.

"Not even my obsessive neatness?" Inara smirked. "You can't tell me it doesn't drive you crazy when I go around behind you and pick up after you."

This was much easier, avoiding the real issues and laughing and teasing about their relationship. It also added a little bit of evidence to support Mal's claim of not thinking about leaving her.

A small chuckle escaped Mal and he shook his head. "One of these days you'll give up on me. Start leavin' things where they drop and the shuttle will be a mess. Long as you're pickin' them up means you're still carin'."

Inara smirked at Mal's comment. "I used to follow the maid's in my father's house and go behind them and clean up what they'd missed. Don't count on me giving that up." Her brow furrowed a moment and she reached out and glided her fingertip over Mal's eyebrow. The bandage was gone but the skin was still new and pink where he'd been cut. "I'll always care," she whispered, her voice gone from light and teasing to serious.

Mal lifted Inara in his arms and stood up carrying her to the bed where he set her down as gently as possible. Toe to heel, he kicked his boots off and then crawled into bed after her and then pulled her to him and kissed her temple. "Rest now, 'Nara... Thinkin' we should leave soon and I want you well as can be."

Inara turned on her side, putting one hand to the back of Mal's neck. She leaned in and kissed him softly, letting it grow into something deeper, more passionate. "I've been sleeping enough. I don't want to sleep right now," she said in a husky whisper against his lips.

Mal returned the kiss, pulling away after he'd let a quiet moan escape into her mouth. "'Nara..." He rested his forehead against hers, a hand resting at the curve of her waist. "What are you wantin'? Cause you ain't exactly in top shape." Even as he spoke, his fingers were gathering the silky material of her nightgown, pulling it up over her legs.

"I just want you," she whispered, her fingers toying with the top button of his shirt. She unbuttoned it and then moved to the second button. "We can take it easy. And Simon did say moderate exercise is good for me, as long as I don't wind myself up," she whispered teasingly against his mouth then nibbled at his bottom lip.

Mal slid his fingertips up Inara's leg to her hip. "Can do all the work... you can just be layin' here and enjoyin' yourself." For the briefest of moments he wondered if Inara had ever let a man do all of the work. His fingers ran lightly over her stomach, pushing aside loose material. "Let me please you..." He whispered against her lips, glad to have something, anything besides dark thoughts and guilt to focus on.

Inara tangled her fingers in Mal's hair, pulling him closer. She twined one of her bare legs with his. "Sounds like paradise to me," she whispered before kissing him again.

**

Inara lay on her side in bed propped up on one elbow. She was watching Mal sleep, a soft smile on her face. She fisted a handful of the sheets to keep from reaching out and touching Mal. He was a light enough sleeper that he’d wake if she did. The night before had been perfect. He'd been sweet, tender and gentle, almost worshipping her. She'd always been the worshipful one in the bedroom. It was part of the job. She'd never been the one worshipped until last night.

She heard Simon approach before he ever knocked. She slipped out of bed as quickly as possible, grabbing a silk kimino from the chair beside the bed as she did. She was still tying the belt at her waist when she cracked open the door. "Mal's asleep. Come back later," she told him in a half whisper.

"I wanted to check on you," Simon told her, confusion muddling his features.

"And I'm fine. Perfectly wonderful. Mal's sleeping. I'll come down to the infirmary later and let you do a thorough check up," Inara whispered.

"You're...uhm...rather you aren't...I mean...you're not exhausting-that is to say..." Simon stammered.

"I'm being good, not getting short winded or too tired out. Now go give the residents of Haven shots or something," she shooed him.

Simon grinned and nodded. "Alright. I do expect to see you later though."

"You will," she promised and shut the door. She crept back to bed, her breath catching as Mal stirred. She relaxed and slipped back under the blankets once he'd grown still again. Her chest ached slightly with the activity but it was worth it to allow Mal the rest he needed.

An hour or so later, there came another knock on the door. Inara nearly slipped and fell trying to get a robe wrapped around her and the door answered before Mal woke up. It was Shepard Book with a tray.

"I thought perhaps you and the Captain might be hungry. Some of the ladies prepared a lunch," he said gesturing with the tray.

"Thank you," Inara said as she reached out to take the tray.

"You shouldn't be carrying anything. I'll bring it in for you," Book offered.

"No! Mal's asleep. I'd really like to keep him that way. I can carry it," Inara quickly assured him, trying to pull the tray away from him.

Book smiled and relinquished his hold on the tray. "I'm glad he's getting some rest. I'll leave you to it then," he nodded slightly and stepped back away from the door.

"Bye," Inara said, a little too rushed for politeness as she shut the door. She placed the tray on the table as quietly as she could and then reached in her bedside table, opened a small plastic pouch and sprinkled a little of the contents onto the ham before putting it back. She snuck back into the bed, grateful that Mal had remained asleep through the visit. A calm took over her when she resumed her position on her side, watching Mal sleep. The rise and fall of his chest was relaxing.

**

“Been a thorn in our side for awhile Malcolm Reynolds. Nothing but a bùyàoliǎn nuòfu.”

Mal felt the sting of a boot to his side over already cracked ribs and grunted as he doubled over. He’d been on his knees in the mess hall full of Alliance officers for an hour now and knew it had to come to an end soon. Leaning back upright, he grinned and shook his head even as the officer ripped his shirt open and cut it off of him. “Admirin’ how pretty I am?” Mal asked quietly and felt another stinging blow to his cheek. He pulled at the cuffs at his back, wanting to strike back but gave up as the metal scraped along skin already raw from pulling at his restraints.

“Just going to have a little fun…” The officer whispered in Mal’s ear as he hauled the man to his feet. He would break this man no matter what it took. He pulled the prisoners pants down to his ankles and then forced him back to his knees.

“Must be runnin’ out of ideas. Should know by now I ain’t got a problem being naked…” Mal spouted even as the room filled with insults and laughter. For the first time, fear sparked in him at what they were going to do to him. He was in no condition to fight against a whole hall of officers. He was weak… hadn’t been fed in days. He’d fight though. He’d fight if any of them got near him. They would have to kill him.

The officer was behind him again and he tried to think quickly of a way out of this. There wasn’t one. “Sure are a pretty hundan.” Mal felt a dagger slide across his chest and for the first time in his life he was glad to be cut on like this. They weren’t going to rape him… for now. A lot of the officers in here looked pretty sly and the way they were looking at him didn’t ease the tension in every muscle in his body. After he was cut on for awhile, left over food was hurled his way. He didn’t mind that either compared to the alternative.

Once he was back in his cell, he relaxed slightly. The humiliation for the day was over. That was a good thing. He’d made it through another one. He hated being helpless, and that was exactly how they liked to keep him. Always drugged, always chained, always under their thumb.

He heard the door open and looked up to see two of the officers standing at the door. He simply watched them as they walked in, shutting the door behind them. They hauled him to his feet and pit his wrists in chains that hung from the ceiling.

“We’ve decided you’re an animal, Captain… Animals don’t need clothes.”

His pants were removed again and this time taken completely off. “Thought you’d had your fun for the day.” He caught sight of the horsewhip in one of the guards’ hands and rolled his eyes, knowing what was coming. More pain… he could take it. He had to.

“Never enough fun where you’re concerned. We just want to hear you voice your agreement that you’re an animal.”

Mal tilted his head slightly as the chains were pulled tight so that he dangled from the ceiling. “Well now some would consider human beings a mammal of sorts.”

“No no… you’re an animal… a pet. We want to hear you say it.”

Mal shook his head. “You’ll be waitin’ awhile for that one.”

An hour later, Mal could feel the blood dripping from his back down his buttocks and legs. It dripped off of his toes into puddles on the floor. The sharp whip crack against the raw, torn skin of his back stung like nothing he’d ever felt. Its effects resounded through every inch of his body and out into the small cell.

“Say it.” The officer ordered.

Mal drew a shaky breath and stayed quiet, keeping his eyes closed. He could take this. He could take it. Another whip crack and he grunted with the pain, letting the sound turn into a sarcastic laugh and then a sound he hadn’t meant to let out. A small whimper of pain. ‘No no no… you can’t be doin’ that. Never break.’

“You’re an animal. Say it, dog.”

Mal was still quiet and shook his head. This time when the whip cracked against his skin he couldn’t help the small cry that escaped him. He was losing it… his control. ‘Stop it. Keep it together.’

“Dog.”

’Can’t loose it. Keep it together. Not a dog. You’re a human bein’… a damn stubborn one. You can do this. Never break. Never let your guard down… never. No.’

**** CRACK****

Mal jerked awake and to a sitting position, checking his wrists for shackles that weren’t there and his back for bloodied cuts that were now only scars. His knees came to his chest as the flowery scent of Inara’s shuttle washed over him like a warm blanket him and he rested his elbows on his knees, burying his head in his hands. He was naked, but that was from earlier when he’d been with Inara. Inara…

He looked around the shuttle finding her next to him. His eyes were red and puffy with unshed tears and fear laced his features, a very rare look. “Time is it? Didn’t mean to sleep so long. Just supposed to be a nap.” He buried his head again and shook it, trying to shake the memories of prison and compose himself as quickly as possible.

Inara closed the bottom drawer of the table beside the bed after dropping something inside of it not even certain what she had been in there for. She moved closer to Mal, curling around him with one arm across his back, her hand on his shoulder and the other one with her palm flat against his chest. She pressed a kiss to his bare shoulder blade. "You needed the sleep," she told him in a whisper before pulling him even closer to her. "Want to tell me about it?" she asked. She didn't need to ask if he'd had a nightmare. That much was obvious. "Let me rephrase...tell me about it."

Mal shook his head, keeping it bowed against his hands. "Ain't lookin' to talk about it." He whispered.

Inara moved back slightly and pressed a kiss to one of the scars on Mal's back. Of course, she'd seen the whip scars before but she hadn't pushed him to talk about it. She kissed another scar and then another. "Tell me about it," she whispered before pressing another kiss to another scar on his back. "It's just me and you, Bao Bei. Just me and you," she whispered before placing another kiss against his scarred back.

Mal felt his resolve slip away a little more with each kiss to his back from Inara. A darkened look laced his features as he lifted his head. The silence dragged on as kiss after kiss brought him back to this shuttle, this bed, and Inara.

"Horsewhip..." He finally whispered into the shuttle. A sarcastic smirk escaped him as he narrowed his eyes, looking straight ahead at nothing in particular. "Wanted me to tell 'em I was an animal... a dog. Guess they never seen the way people dress up some of those fine pets in the core cause they said animals ain't needin' clothes. Took mine. Made me sit there in front of all of them... laughin' at me. Not a dog... wouldn't say it."

Anger made Inara stiff, tense for a moment before she willed herself to let it go. Mal didn't need her to be angry for him. He just needed her to be there. Guilt washed over her, regardless of how irrational, because she'd put him back into that again while she was in the hospital. She placed another kiss on his back.

"Good. I'm glad you didn't," she said quietly. She could have admonished him, told him he should have said it so that the whipping would stop. He didn't need that either. She breathed out slowly, letting her breath slip across his skin before kissing one of the scars again. She swallowed hard and closed her eyes tight. "I love you, Mal."

"Took everything I had to keep it together there. There were times I didn't and I hate that. Lettin' them break me..." Mal shook slightly with the emotional memories that swept over him. He rambled over words that spilled from him. "Just couldn't sometimes... and things got fuzzy and messed up in my head with all the drugs they was givin’ me. Got dark. Things get dark and I can't find a way to get out of the dark. Sometimes I think it's safer there... but then sometimes it ain't. I can't..." He trailed off, bowing his head again and gasping for air as if there were a shortage.

Inara's heart broke for Mal and anger at Zoe for letting this happen to him washed over. It could have all been prevented if the first mate had just waved Inara. She forced herself to keep all the tension and anger out of her body and actions though. Mal didn't need her anger.

"Shhhh Bao Bei Deep breaths, in and out. You're okay. You're sitting right here in our shuttle and I'm right here with you," she told him in a calm half whisper. She bowed her head and kissed the back of his neck, then his shoulder and the middle of his back. "I'll help you find a way out of the dark. I promise."

Mal shook his head and smirked a forced, sarcastic smirk. "You don't need this. You don't need this, 'Nara... man who can't get past what's done and over with?"

He stood up, getting out of the bed and obviously not caring that he was naked. A shaky hand ran back through his hair as he rambled. "Was with Niska... never broke. Died once with him. Man killed me and brought me back for more torturin'." A small laugh escaped him. "Three months... three months with the Alliance and I lost it. Before Zoe finally came to get me... part of me was wishin' for them to kill me. Always fight... never give up... just keep goin'... work your way through it. Just keep fightin'. I couldn't keep... Thought I wouldn't make it through."

He looked back to Inara, his eyes still wide with hard emotion. "Fallen off that pedestal yet? Mighty high up there..."

He'd died? Anger and outrage at that swept through Inara, oddly enough anger not at Niska but anger at Mal that he'd gone and died on her. She bit the tip of her tongue, physically holding back the barrage of words, pushing her own fear down. If he'd died once he could die again and then...She used the method the guild had taught her of pushing back emotions and issues. She opened a door in her mind, put the anger there then closed and locked the door. She could take it out later and examine it. For the moment, Mal needed her to be calm. He needed reassurance, not recrimination.

Inara got up in a graceful, fluid movement from the bed, dragging the bed sheet with her. She walked over to Mal and wrapped her arms around him, pulling the sheet around both of them. One hand slid up to his face and she laid her palm flat against his cheek. "Look at me. We're both here standing with our feet on the ground. There's no pedestal." She knew a few things about pedestals and how far it was to fall when people realized you didn't belong up there. Companions were born on pedestals and they fell regularly.

"It's just you and me in here. There's no need for pedestals. And if there were and you did fall...I'd catch you," she smiled softly at him then tiptoed and placed a soft kiss against his lips. She rested her forehead against his, her fingers entwined in the hair at the nape of his neck. "And I swear to Buddha if you ever die on me again, I will make Niska and the Alliance both look like sweet grandparents," she told him in a half teasing, half serious voice.

"Ain't possible..." Mal whispered, his head bowed as he studied Inara. "'Sides, you're the one who almost died... Woulda died anyway if you had." He closed his eyes, leaning into where the palm of her hand touched his cheek. "So sick of the Alliance messin' with people. Like to get in your mind and make you do things that you shouldn't and do things you don't want to. Get in there and screw everything up this way and that anyway they can. Humiliate... shame... hurt... Make a gorram mess in my head."

"Shhh. We'll straighten the mess out," Inara told him, running her fingers through his hair. She slipped one hand to the back of his head and pulled him against her, letting him rest his head on her shoulder, his nose tucked into her neck. "There's no humiliation or shame here and I'll take care of all the hurt," she told him in quiet whispers, rocking him slightly as she held him.

Mal thought about pulling away. Inara didn't need to be coddling him or taking care of him. He was supposed to take care of her. She'd been shot on his watch, right in front of him. Just a few moments of this wouldn't hurt though. He needed it. He felt worn and tired as if he hadn't just woken up. His muscles were relaxed as if he hadn’t just had a nightmare that was all too real.

"M'okay..." He whispered after the silence had completely permeated the shuttle. "I'll be okay, 'Nara..." He pulled back slightly so that he could see her through weary eyes. "Just... gotta work through it, just like everything else."

He reached up to trail his fingertips over her forehead. "You gotta sit down... can't be movin' around so much just yet."

"Only if you'll come sit with me," Inara told him, slowly uncoiling from him. The truth was she needed this as much as he did. "Grab that tray over there and come back to bed. Shepard Book brought us some lunch while you were sleeping."

Mal grabbed a pair of his pants and pulled them on, then got the tray and took it to the bed after Inara. He climbed in and sat next to her. "You know I got things to be doin'. Can't stay in here all day." His voice lacked the normal spark it usually carried. He felt like he'd been hauled behind a galloping horse and even though he knew he hadn’t, he was weary from it.

"I know," Inara answered. She realized Mal needed time to himself. He had things to sort out in his head. "They'll wait until you've eaten something," she told him, uncovering the tray. It was filled with a plate of ham and two bowls full of vegetables and fruits. She handed him a slice of ham. "We'll make it through together. I'm stubborn, remember?" she smiled at him.

Mal took the slice of ham and bit into it. "You gonna eat too?" He asked.

"As long as you do," Inara grinned at him and picked up a slice of apple from a bowl of fruit beside the plate. She bit into it, savoring the flavor. "Shepard brought me some of that the other day and it was wonderful." She popped the rest of the apple in her mouth and cut a piece of ham for Mal, holding the fork out for him.

Mal took the piece of ham from the fork with his fingers and took a bite. "S'good..." He nodded. "Don't gotta feed me 'Nara... M'fine." He finished the piece of ham then lay down again on the bed.

"I know I don't have to. Ever consider that I like doing it? I enjoy mothering you, Mal. Especially because you don't expect me too," Inara said as she lay down next to Mal. She put the plate of food on his stomach, took a bite of a peach for herself and then plucked a strawberry from the plate, holding it up to his lips.

Mal hesitated for a moment then leaned up to bite into the strawberry that Inara held out to him. "Say it again..." He said quietly after a moment. "Heard you say it earlier, just didn't register 'til now. Said you love me and I wanna hear it again."

Inara dipped her head, blushing slightly. "I love you, Mal," she whispered. She looked up at him after a moment and smiled softly. "I spent so long denying it. It's the reason I left Serenity in the first place. I don't want to deny it anymore. I love you."

Mal reached over, his hand going to the back of Inara's neck and pulled her to him for a strawberry sweet kiss. "Good to hear..." He whispered against her lips then lay back against the pillows, a yawn escaping him. "Don't know why I'm so tired again..."

"Well I did make you work hard last night," Inara teased him as she reached over and smoothed the hair off his forehead. She cut another piece of ham and held it up for Mal to eat.

"Didn't make me... was a thing I wanted to do." Mal said, a small grin lacing his lips. He took the piece of ham and bit into it.

Inara took a bite of the peach she held and smiled at him. "You were very good at it too," she paused, bowing her head for a moment. "I'm not used to that...I mean...not like that. You made me feel...cherished and loved. Thank you," she whispered a little awkwardly.

"Well you are... both of those. Only right you should be feelin' it." Mal finished the small bit of ham Inara had given him. He grinned lightly, happy to hear that no one had ever simply pleased her before. "Glad I didn't disappoint." He liked being different to Inara from those who had come before him.

"Oh no. There were lots of things, mostly fuzziness but there was no disappointment what so ever," Inara grinned at him. She picked up another apple slice, bit it in half and held the other half up for Mal to eat.

Mal leaned up to get the other half of the apple with his teeth and then rested back against the pillows as he ate it. "Don't want anymore food." He said quietly after a moment around another lazy yawn. "Close my eyes for a little bit, you'll wake me up if anyone's needin' me?"

"Sleep..." she whispered. "I'll wake you up," she promised as she moved the plate over to the nightstand and laid her head on Mal's shoulder, her arm across his stomach.

Mal was snoring softly beside her, a soft rumbling sound. Inara slipped out of the bed, wrapping a silk robe around her waist. She sat down at the comm screen and glanced over her shoulder, making certain that Mal was still asleep. Once she'd assured herself he was, she signed onto the cortex, logged into a special email account and typed out a message.

Will be leaving Haven soon. Nothing else of note to report yet. Will keep you posted.

I.S.

She signed off the cortex, powered down the comm screen and slipped back into bed with Mal. She curled up to him, placing a soft kiss on his shoulder and closed her eyes. Within moments she was asleep again.