(no subject)

[shanaqui]

Title: Play Pretend
Author: twilightsrain/edenbound (ficjournal)
Summary: Mal and Inara steal a moment.
Rating: PG
Characters: Mal, Inara
Pairing: Mal/Inara
Warning: Angst, sap
Spoilers/Timeline: Post Serenity, no spoilers
Disclaimer: Joss is boss.
Author's Note: Written for 15pairings.


Mal catches her alone, going through the things she left behind when she left for the first time. She knows it's a bad idea for them to be alone together at all -- a bad idea by her standards, anyway -- but she doesn't hurry to leave. Instead she turns to face the not-quite-threat of him, lifting her chin slightly so she can look into his eyes. She gathers herself together before she speaks, taking a deep breath. "Yes?"

"No need for you to stop doin'... whatever it is you were doin'. I just wanted to see you."

His feelings are more naked than they were during that conversation after what had happened at the whorehouse (use disrespectful words, distance yourself, make it mean less) and his manner a little more relaxed. Inara feels the danger of that as much as the temptation to reach out and take what could be hers, what, maybe, should be hers. She doesn't. "Well, I don't want to see you."

"Oh, come on, Inara, you know I know you too well to believe that."

"You don't know me at all," she says, a little coldly, taking a tiny step back (re-establish a professional distance, smile but not warmly, make him feel unwanted).

His voice is a little tender as he takes a tiny step forward to compensate, reaching up to caress her cheek -- he smiles when she leans into the touch without meaning to and she curses herself as he moves that little bit closer. "Pretend I do."

"This is a bad idea," she reminds him, shakily.

"I got no doubts on that score, 'nara, but I want to take my one chance," he tells her, seriously, shadows of pain already in his eyes again. All she wants to do is give in, just this once, taste what she so desperately wants before denying herself it. Feel the goodness of it and know that no Companion is allowed that, remind herself of the fact again and again.

She stamps hard on the treacherous thought that, then, she is not meant to be a Companion.

Inara lets Mal kiss her, watches him close his eyes before she closes hers, lets him pull her closer. When he pulls away, eyes opening half way and a slight smile on his face, his voice is a little rough. "Let's pretend, Inara."

The please goes unspoken, but she hears it all the same. She should say no. There are so many reasons to say no and so few to say yes, but somehow the few overcome the many and she nods, slowly. When he moves to kiss her she puts her hand up between them, touches her fingers to his lips to stop him just for a moment. "Just this once."

"This once," he agrees, and then she lets him kiss her.

Comments

[agent-rouka.livejournal.com]

Aching and tender. What a wonderful sense of understanding, throughout! Inara understanding herself and simply struggling with the options, Mal understanding that he doesn't really know her, and knowing how to ignore that, the way these two allow themselves to reach and not run, respectively.

And all woven into a lovely, quiet mood.

Great moment. :)

[shanaqui]

Thank you very much. :) ♥