[ fic ] just a momentary thing

[sardonicynic]

title: just a momentary thing
author: sardonicynic
summary: he's sure he's doing this all wrong.
rating: r for adult content and language
character(s): mal reynolds
spoilers: honestly? none.
word count: 196
disclaimer: the characters aren't mine; the words are. joss, please don't sue — lowly copy editors aren't worth the effort.
a/n: written for the ever-lovely adam_bat. set pre-series; prompt from leonard cohen's "hallelujah": maybe there's a god above // but all I ever learned from love // was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you. title from something happens' "momentary thing." feedback is love, but be brutal; i welcome comments and criticism of all kinds.




He's all elbows and knees, teeth bumping against hers, and he's sure he's doing this all wrong.

She seems to enjoy herself well enough for their first time — what's certainly his first ever, and probably hers. But Malcolm's a skinny, fumbling teenager in the worst kind of way. He comes too soon with a choked sound, nose buried in the curve of her shoulder.

"Constance — āiyā, duìbùqĭ." He's mumbling into her collarbone, breathing hard and feeling about as useful as a one-legged horse.

She tips her head to look at him, gold-red afternoon light from the far window of the hayloft catching her dark hair, giving it a shine brighter than Shadow's sun.

"It doesn't matter," she says, smiling.

He lifts his head, and for some reason, her smile and the particular look in her brown eyes set his naked spine to tingling in a manner that ain't pleasant at all.

"We're just foolin' around, Malcolm."

He flushes hot, and swallows twice, shifting just so above her.

"'Course," he says, giving her a quick smile, and he don't ruminate too hard on why the agreement tastes like dirt in his mouth.




- - - - -

translations

āiyā : damn
duìbùqĭ : I'm sorry

Comments

[frogfarm]

That IS brutal, an awesome way to fulfill the prompt, and rather stunningly insightful into Mal's attitudes.

[sardonicynic]

Thanks muchly! So glad to hear you enjoyed this ficlet, and that it strikes you as, well, Mal. <3!

[how-obscure.livejournal.com]

You know, I never really thought much about Mal's sexual history, but he doesn't seem like one to just fool around. This is a nice insight into his character. It's so like him to flash a smile and act like he's not hurt.

I really like the opening sentence and the lines But Malcolm's a skinny, fumbling teenager in the worst kind of way and He flushes hot, and swallows twice.

[sardonicynic]

Thanks so much! I'm sixteen kinds of glad to hear that this resonated with you; it's so short, I wondered if it would work in translation. Cheers for reading, and for the kind words!

[rocketgirl2.livejournal.com]

I love this. So little fic actually approaches sex in this manner, and you've made it so realistic. Great look into Mal's past (and that song...)!

[sardonicynic]

Thanks muchly -- you're way too kind! This is definitely the type of boot-knocking that tends to get skirted over, because it is realistic and unfulfilling. (Sorry, Mal. ;D) But I'm so glad it struck you as something that could've happened in his misspent youth, and that you enjoyed the read. <3!

[rocketgirl2.livejournal.com]

It's fulfilling in a different kind of way than most fic. ;) It is nice to read a piece that's not just fluff and/or porn. There's just not much of that out there.

[sardonicynic]

B'aww, again with the too-niceness! You're making me blush over here, lady. ;D Seriously, thanks so much.