Fic: The Planets Will Turn Pt. 8
Feb. 8th, 2006 12:25 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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firefly_fanfic
Title: The Planets Will Turn Part 8
Author: greta_garbo
Fandom: Firefly
Pairing: Jayne/River
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my incredible wit.
Summary: River makes one last soap opera attempt toward Jayne, and the crew finally sorts out what's going on.
Notes: There's probably only going to be one more after this, just so you all know.
Jayne avoided River even more than he had been for the next few days. River tried to get his attention, but she knew it was only a matter of time, so she went about her business, watching The Planets Will turn with Kaylee and playing dinosaurs with Wash.
Mal kept a wary eye on Jayne at all times, as did Simon, only he tried to do it in a less obvious, less intimidating way. Zoe watched him, too, but it wasn’t at all in an intimidating way. Which made Jayne even more nervous. She looked at him like she was trying to something. Then she’d just shake her head and walk away. That woman was acting all manner of confusing.
Kaylee was just smiling at him. A lot. And not long after, Wash started to smile at him, too. Whole damn ship was going completely bughouse crazy. It was enough to drive a man right our of his mind along with the rest of the crew.
---------------------------
River watched half-heartedly as Melissa and Warren made up and kissed. It wasn’t that she no longer enjoyed her soap operas, because she still did. But she was beginning to think looking to them for guidance wasn’t a good idea.
Kaylee plopped down next to her. “I’ve only got a few minutes to watch, then I have to get back to my girl. What’s happenin’?”
“Melissa and Warren are finally making up,” River explained.
“Finally! I mean, I know it’s a lot to get through, what with her getting knocked up by another guy and him trying to kill that other guy, but they’ve always been such a great couple.”
River nodded as Kaylee tried to catch up. “Ooh, they get to have make-up sex!” Kaylee squeeled. “That’s the best kind.”
River’s head shot up. She had never really heard of any of her soap opera scenarios occurring to people she knew, so she was suddenly eager to have personal assessment.
“Make-up sex is something that happens often?”
“If you’re lucky,” Kaylee said slyly.
“That doesn’t make sense,” River said. “Why would it be lucky? You’re only having it often if you fight often.”
“Honey, couples fight all the time. It’s something you just can’t avoid. But if you can cool off and forgive enough to have some really great make-up sex, then you know you’re relationships in the right place.”
River looked of into space and began to think. After a few moments Kaylee asked, “You okay? You’re like, a million miles away.”
“I think I owe Jayne an apology for kidnapping him,” River said finally.
---------------------------
Jayne dropped into his bunk to find River waiting for him. “Hi, Jayne!” she said cheerily.
Jayne stopped, terrified. “What the hell you doin’ in my room, girl?”
“Don’t worry,” River said. “Nobody’s coming.”
“You git, you hear me?” He said, ignoring her. Last thing he needed was someone finding her in here.
“The last thing you need is me too close to you,” River said. “That’s what you’re really scare of, isn’t it? Being to close to me. Not being able to control yourself. Chemicals. Adrenaline.” She smiled and stretched, as if she was being lavished in those chemicals she was talking about.
Jayne just stared. “What are you doing down here?”
River blinked, as if she had forgotten where she was. “Apologizing,” she said once she had gotten a hold on herself.
Jayne just kept staring at her.
“For kidnapping you,” she continued. “Shouldn’t have done it. Should have known you’d get in trouble for it. I’m sorry.”
Jayne shifted, nervously, not sure if she really was sorry or if she was just getting at something. River looked up at him urgently.
“I am sorry, really! I wouldn’t want you to get in trouble, especially because of me.”
She seemed sincere enough. “Okay, then,” Jayne said awkwardly. Apologies weren’t something he was good with. “Apology…you know….accepted.”
“Good,” River smiled even wider and stood up, smoothing her skirts down and looking at him expectantly. He stared at her, completely unsure what she was getting at. She continued to look at him, growing impatient.
“Well?” She asked after several moments passed.
“Well what?”
“We had a fight.”
“Wasn’t really a fight.”
“A disagreement. An apology was made.”
“And.”
“Make-up sex.”
Jayne groaned and ran his hand down his face. He should have known better. He felt River move closer to him. “Make-up sex, Jayne. We have to have it. We have to know our relationship is solid.”
She needed to stop getting so close to him. He really didn’t need anyone stumbling in on them like this, after what had happened on the shuttle.
He put out his hand to stop her, but before he could move further, the hatch to him bunk opened.
“Jayne,” Mal yelled down. Jayne winced in silent pain. This was it. He was done for. He tried to decide whether he’d prefer going out the airlock or getting his balls chopped off.
“We’re looking for the girl,” Mal said as he started down the ladder. “Can’t seem to find her anywhere, and I had this hunch….” he stopped once he hit the ground. “And it looks like I was right.”
---------------------------
The crew gathered around the galley table, sans River. Mal decided the child didn’t need to be there when they decided what to do with Jayne. River had tried to protest, but Simon had given her some pencils and a pad of paper and sternly told her to wait in her room. River had seen how much he wanted her elsewhere, so she took pity on him and agreed. Mal had to hand it to the doc, at least he hadn’t doped her.
Mal stood pacing, while everyone else sat around the table. Jayne twiddled his thumbs nervously.
“Okay,” Mal thundered. The crew jumped, and Mal decided to lower his voice and change his tone, just a little. “Okay. There have been some mighty strange things happening on my ship lately. Most of them having to do with you,” Mal pointed at Jayne, “and that sweet little girl who’s coloring in her room right now.”
“Why do we have to be here for this?” Wash asked.
“I’ve been reviewing the facts,” Mal said. “And as far as I can tell, Jayne didn’t kidnap himself. The girl’s getting some funny notions, and I want to find out where she’s been getting them from.”
“Maybe Jayne’s been telling her what to do,” Simon tried desperately. Everyone at the table suppressed their laughs.
“Sweetie, when was the last time you were able to get River to do anything she really didn‘t want to?” Kaylee asked.
Simon closed his mouth and looked down at her hands.
“Now, Jayne. I want you to tell me every detail of what’s been going on between you and River. So I can find out exactly what that girl’s been thinking, and so I can decide whether or not I’m going to throw you out the airlock.”
Jayne gulped. So it was the airlock then. He was a little more than embarrassed to be sharing the bizarre courtship River had unleashed upon him, so he stumbled through it as quickly as he could.
“The girl came up to me one night a few years ago wearing this little nighty, telling me I needed to tear it off her. So I just pushed her off on her brother. Then she made some cookies and said something about cookies equaling sex. I just ran away. Then she had this whole elaborate thing about how she was 18, and then she told me…” he trailed off then, really not wanting to go there.
“Told you what?” Mal prodded.
Jayne gulped, mortified. “Told me she was a virgin.”
Simon turned beet red, and Jayne wasn’t sure if it was out of rage or embarrassment. He looked over to see Mal redden, too, and figured that, in that case, it was probably mostly out of embarrassment.
He found that Simon’s coloring was due to rage when the young doctor shouted, “And I bet that just revved you up even more, didn’t it, you ape?”
Kaylee started laughing then. “Something funny, little Kaylee?” Mal asked impatiently.
“Sorry, cap’n,” Kaylee gasped. “It’s just….revved up!? Who the hell says that?” she laughed harder, and soon Inara and Wash joined her. Simon’s blush deepened, and Jayne knew that this time it was definitely out of embarrassment.
“The doc has a point, though,” Mal said, glaring at Jayne.
Jayne looked at Mal with indignation written all over his face. “I’ve done a lot of bad things, but when she told me that, I ran the other way. Fast as I could.”
Mal looked at him for a moment, trying to decide if her was lying. “I suppose you did.”
“What?” Simon asked. “How do you suppose that?”
“If they’d already had sex then she wouldn’t have had cause to kidnap him,” Inara supplied.
“Exactly. Not Jayne’s fault. Are you all forgetting the part where she drugged me and tied me up?”
Kaylee looked deep in thought suddenly. “Hang on.”
“You got something to say?” Mal asked.
“I think…” her face was screwed up, trying to remember. “You say she wanted you to rip through her nightgown?”
Jayne nodded.
“And then she said something pretty much like ‘cookies equal sex’?”
Another nod.
“Then she tried to seduce you on her 18th birthday?”
“Near enough.”
The look on Kaylee’s face became more and more distressed. “And then she kidnapped you?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, no,” Kaylee muttered.
“What?” Mal asked. “What’s wrong?”
“I think I know where she got her ideas to seduce Jayne.”
“You didn’t give them to her, did you?” Simon asked.
“God, no! I like to think I’m a bit more subtle than that!”
“Then where’d she get them?” Mal said.
Kaylee looked around the table. “Those are all storylines from The Planets Will Turn.”
The table grew silent for a moment. “She got those ideas from ruttin’ soap operas?” Mal roared.
Jayne just sat, silently, watching Mal’s rage grow. At least the captain wasn’t mad at him anymore.
“I know those stupid shows were a bad idea. But you were all smiley and ‘no, cap’n. All young girls need soaps. It’s a part of growin’ up’. See what happens when I listen to you?” Kaylee flinched at the captain’s rants. “Doc,” Mal said to Simon, “go fetch your sister.”
Simon scampered away while the rest of the crew listened to Mal creatively string together Mandarin curses. Soon, Simon walked into the room, River trailing behind him. Mal look up at the girl.
“You really been going after Jayne using soap operas as your guide?”
River nodded guiltily. Mal swore some more. “Okay,” he said. “That’s it. No more soaps.”
River looked up at him, her face filled with disbelief and anger.
“I mean it. I don’t want you getting anymore ideas. You’re too smart for that go se anyway.”
River looked properly scolded. Wash leaned over to pat her hand. “Tough break, kid.”
“Not just kid,” Mal said. “When I said no soaps, I meant just that. NO SOAPS. No more soap operas on the ship. Period.”
“Cap’n!” Kaylee and Wash shouted in unison.
“No, I ain’t discussin’ this further. You two should be trying to set good examples for River. Can’t do that watching something she’s been banned from. No more soaps. That’s final.”
Wash and Kaylee look down at the floor.
“Now, we got that all dealt with, we need to talk about Jayne and River.”
Jayne groaned as the attention was brought back to him.
“Little witch,” Mal turned to River. “Why Jayne?”
“Hey,” Jayne protested, but Mal ignored him.
River looked to Zoe, who smiled encouragingly. River felt nervous speaking her feelings in front of the whole crew. She looked over at Simon, who just looked upset and confused. “Warm,” she let out shakily. “Makes my head feel warm. Safe. Sees me.”
Everyone looks at her, confused, but she’s just glad she was able to get the thoughts out without too much trouble.
“Mei mei,” Simon began.
“Not little girl,” River started before he could even get his thoughts out. “Not little anymore. 18. Can choose a man. I choose Jayne.”
Simon looked at her, flabbergasted. “Not a little girl,” River repeated. Then, after a minute, “Would still appreciate an allowance, though.”
FIN
Author: greta_garbo
Fandom: Firefly
Pairing: Jayne/River
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my incredible wit.
Summary: River makes one last soap opera attempt toward Jayne, and the crew finally sorts out what's going on.
Notes: There's probably only going to be one more after this, just so you all know.
Jayne avoided River even more than he had been for the next few days. River tried to get his attention, but she knew it was only a matter of time, so she went about her business, watching The Planets Will turn with Kaylee and playing dinosaurs with Wash.
Mal kept a wary eye on Jayne at all times, as did Simon, only he tried to do it in a less obvious, less intimidating way. Zoe watched him, too, but it wasn’t at all in an intimidating way. Which made Jayne even more nervous. She looked at him like she was trying to something. Then she’d just shake her head and walk away. That woman was acting all manner of confusing.
Kaylee was just smiling at him. A lot. And not long after, Wash started to smile at him, too. Whole damn ship was going completely bughouse crazy. It was enough to drive a man right our of his mind along with the rest of the crew.
---------------------------
River watched half-heartedly as Melissa and Warren made up and kissed. It wasn’t that she no longer enjoyed her soap operas, because she still did. But she was beginning to think looking to them for guidance wasn’t a good idea.
Kaylee plopped down next to her. “I’ve only got a few minutes to watch, then I have to get back to my girl. What’s happenin’?”
“Melissa and Warren are finally making up,” River explained.
“Finally! I mean, I know it’s a lot to get through, what with her getting knocked up by another guy and him trying to kill that other guy, but they’ve always been such a great couple.”
River nodded as Kaylee tried to catch up. “Ooh, they get to have make-up sex!” Kaylee squeeled. “That’s the best kind.”
River’s head shot up. She had never really heard of any of her soap opera scenarios occurring to people she knew, so she was suddenly eager to have personal assessment.
“Make-up sex is something that happens often?”
“If you’re lucky,” Kaylee said slyly.
“That doesn’t make sense,” River said. “Why would it be lucky? You’re only having it often if you fight often.”
“Honey, couples fight all the time. It’s something you just can’t avoid. But if you can cool off and forgive enough to have some really great make-up sex, then you know you’re relationships in the right place.”
River looked of into space and began to think. After a few moments Kaylee asked, “You okay? You’re like, a million miles away.”
“I think I owe Jayne an apology for kidnapping him,” River said finally.
---------------------------
Jayne dropped into his bunk to find River waiting for him. “Hi, Jayne!” she said cheerily.
Jayne stopped, terrified. “What the hell you doin’ in my room, girl?”
“Don’t worry,” River said. “Nobody’s coming.”
“You git, you hear me?” He said, ignoring her. Last thing he needed was someone finding her in here.
“The last thing you need is me too close to you,” River said. “That’s what you’re really scare of, isn’t it? Being to close to me. Not being able to control yourself. Chemicals. Adrenaline.” She smiled and stretched, as if she was being lavished in those chemicals she was talking about.
Jayne just stared. “What are you doing down here?”
River blinked, as if she had forgotten where she was. “Apologizing,” she said once she had gotten a hold on herself.
Jayne just kept staring at her.
“For kidnapping you,” she continued. “Shouldn’t have done it. Should have known you’d get in trouble for it. I’m sorry.”
Jayne shifted, nervously, not sure if she really was sorry or if she was just getting at something. River looked up at him urgently.
“I am sorry, really! I wouldn’t want you to get in trouble, especially because of me.”
She seemed sincere enough. “Okay, then,” Jayne said awkwardly. Apologies weren’t something he was good with. “Apology…you know….accepted.”
“Good,” River smiled even wider and stood up, smoothing her skirts down and looking at him expectantly. He stared at her, completely unsure what she was getting at. She continued to look at him, growing impatient.
“Well?” She asked after several moments passed.
“Well what?”
“We had a fight.”
“Wasn’t really a fight.”
“A disagreement. An apology was made.”
“And.”
“Make-up sex.”
Jayne groaned and ran his hand down his face. He should have known better. He felt River move closer to him. “Make-up sex, Jayne. We have to have it. We have to know our relationship is solid.”
She needed to stop getting so close to him. He really didn’t need anyone stumbling in on them like this, after what had happened on the shuttle.
He put out his hand to stop her, but before he could move further, the hatch to him bunk opened.
“Jayne,” Mal yelled down. Jayne winced in silent pain. This was it. He was done for. He tried to decide whether he’d prefer going out the airlock or getting his balls chopped off.
“We’re looking for the girl,” Mal said as he started down the ladder. “Can’t seem to find her anywhere, and I had this hunch….” he stopped once he hit the ground. “And it looks like I was right.”
---------------------------
The crew gathered around the galley table, sans River. Mal decided the child didn’t need to be there when they decided what to do with Jayne. River had tried to protest, but Simon had given her some pencils and a pad of paper and sternly told her to wait in her room. River had seen how much he wanted her elsewhere, so she took pity on him and agreed. Mal had to hand it to the doc, at least he hadn’t doped her.
Mal stood pacing, while everyone else sat around the table. Jayne twiddled his thumbs nervously.
“Okay,” Mal thundered. The crew jumped, and Mal decided to lower his voice and change his tone, just a little. “Okay. There have been some mighty strange things happening on my ship lately. Most of them having to do with you,” Mal pointed at Jayne, “and that sweet little girl who’s coloring in her room right now.”
“Why do we have to be here for this?” Wash asked.
“I’ve been reviewing the facts,” Mal said. “And as far as I can tell, Jayne didn’t kidnap himself. The girl’s getting some funny notions, and I want to find out where she’s been getting them from.”
“Maybe Jayne’s been telling her what to do,” Simon tried desperately. Everyone at the table suppressed their laughs.
“Sweetie, when was the last time you were able to get River to do anything she really didn‘t want to?” Kaylee asked.
Simon closed his mouth and looked down at her hands.
“Now, Jayne. I want you to tell me every detail of what’s been going on between you and River. So I can find out exactly what that girl’s been thinking, and so I can decide whether or not I’m going to throw you out the airlock.”
Jayne gulped. So it was the airlock then. He was a little more than embarrassed to be sharing the bizarre courtship River had unleashed upon him, so he stumbled through it as quickly as he could.
“The girl came up to me one night a few years ago wearing this little nighty, telling me I needed to tear it off her. So I just pushed her off on her brother. Then she made some cookies and said something about cookies equaling sex. I just ran away. Then she had this whole elaborate thing about how she was 18, and then she told me…” he trailed off then, really not wanting to go there.
“Told you what?” Mal prodded.
Jayne gulped, mortified. “Told me she was a virgin.”
Simon turned beet red, and Jayne wasn’t sure if it was out of rage or embarrassment. He looked over to see Mal redden, too, and figured that, in that case, it was probably mostly out of embarrassment.
He found that Simon’s coloring was due to rage when the young doctor shouted, “And I bet that just revved you up even more, didn’t it, you ape?”
Kaylee started laughing then. “Something funny, little Kaylee?” Mal asked impatiently.
“Sorry, cap’n,” Kaylee gasped. “It’s just….revved up!? Who the hell says that?” she laughed harder, and soon Inara and Wash joined her. Simon’s blush deepened, and Jayne knew that this time it was definitely out of embarrassment.
“The doc has a point, though,” Mal said, glaring at Jayne.
Jayne looked at Mal with indignation written all over his face. “I’ve done a lot of bad things, but when she told me that, I ran the other way. Fast as I could.”
Mal looked at him for a moment, trying to decide if her was lying. “I suppose you did.”
“What?” Simon asked. “How do you suppose that?”
“If they’d already had sex then she wouldn’t have had cause to kidnap him,” Inara supplied.
“Exactly. Not Jayne’s fault. Are you all forgetting the part where she drugged me and tied me up?”
Kaylee looked deep in thought suddenly. “Hang on.”
“You got something to say?” Mal asked.
“I think…” her face was screwed up, trying to remember. “You say she wanted you to rip through her nightgown?”
Jayne nodded.
“And then she said something pretty much like ‘cookies equal sex’?”
Another nod.
“Then she tried to seduce you on her 18th birthday?”
“Near enough.”
The look on Kaylee’s face became more and more distressed. “And then she kidnapped you?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh, no,” Kaylee muttered.
“What?” Mal asked. “What’s wrong?”
“I think I know where she got her ideas to seduce Jayne.”
“You didn’t give them to her, did you?” Simon asked.
“God, no! I like to think I’m a bit more subtle than that!”
“Then where’d she get them?” Mal said.
Kaylee looked around the table. “Those are all storylines from The Planets Will Turn.”
The table grew silent for a moment. “She got those ideas from ruttin’ soap operas?” Mal roared.
Jayne just sat, silently, watching Mal’s rage grow. At least the captain wasn’t mad at him anymore.
“I know those stupid shows were a bad idea. But you were all smiley and ‘no, cap’n. All young girls need soaps. It’s a part of growin’ up’. See what happens when I listen to you?” Kaylee flinched at the captain’s rants. “Doc,” Mal said to Simon, “go fetch your sister.”
Simon scampered away while the rest of the crew listened to Mal creatively string together Mandarin curses. Soon, Simon walked into the room, River trailing behind him. Mal look up at the girl.
“You really been going after Jayne using soap operas as your guide?”
River nodded guiltily. Mal swore some more. “Okay,” he said. “That’s it. No more soaps.”
River looked up at him, her face filled with disbelief and anger.
“I mean it. I don’t want you getting anymore ideas. You’re too smart for that go se anyway.”
River looked properly scolded. Wash leaned over to pat her hand. “Tough break, kid.”
“Not just kid,” Mal said. “When I said no soaps, I meant just that. NO SOAPS. No more soap operas on the ship. Period.”
“Cap’n!” Kaylee and Wash shouted in unison.
“No, I ain’t discussin’ this further. You two should be trying to set good examples for River. Can’t do that watching something she’s been banned from. No more soaps. That’s final.”
Wash and Kaylee look down at the floor.
“Now, we got that all dealt with, we need to talk about Jayne and River.”
Jayne groaned as the attention was brought back to him.
“Little witch,” Mal turned to River. “Why Jayne?”
“Hey,” Jayne protested, but Mal ignored him.
River looked to Zoe, who smiled encouragingly. River felt nervous speaking her feelings in front of the whole crew. She looked over at Simon, who just looked upset and confused. “Warm,” she let out shakily. “Makes my head feel warm. Safe. Sees me.”
Everyone looks at her, confused, but she’s just glad she was able to get the thoughts out without too much trouble.
“Mei mei,” Simon began.
“Not little girl,” River started before he could even get his thoughts out. “Not little anymore. 18. Can choose a man. I choose Jayne.”
Simon looked at her, flabbergasted. “Not a little girl,” River repeated. Then, after a minute, “Would still appreciate an allowance, though.”
FIN
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Date: 2006-02-08 05:34 am (UTC)(no subject)
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